thrive

So the good news is that Buddy Slim has taken over most of my un-necessary eating time and my likely-to-binge times. I log on during my son’s naps and at night and those were HUGE overeating times of day. I’m also watching less TV at night and that helps me eat less as with me, TV = food. Although last night I did watch Biggest Loser - you all got me so excited! I wanted to eat while I watched it but that just seems wrong so I had tea. Bummer about Curtis and Mallory - they were rockstars.

Anyway, I am digressing…

So lots of good - tons of good - pounds of good!

Here’s the rub…I am staying up late to log in. I am ignoring my kid and husband at times to log in. This is what I was doing with TV and food before. It was this GIANT distraction. The big worry is that I am starting to stay up late again and I was trying to go to bed earlier, by 11.  Sleep has been so missed over the last 3 years that choosing it has been so wonderful and such a big part of me changing and being really present to my life and my life here at home. I am worried that I won’t really make this life transformation. See, for me, I really am excited to be different - to be the person I always wanted to be. I just don’t want to sabotauge (how do you spell that) myself by missing out on zzzzs. I know I just need to log in less. Last night I turned off the computer at 10:30 and went to bed WITH my DH rather than let him go to sleep alone while I hang out with the computer (it used to be the TV).

Buddy Slim and all my buddies are so remarkable and this place is what is helping me become the me I’ve always wanted and yet, like everything, there must be balance, yes? I keep learning that in all these different ways…Let’s see how I do. I don’t want to miss out on anyone’s blogs, or the forums, or my own need to write. Here goes!  My goal is to be in bed by 11 every night! If you see my lurking close to that (Squiggly, you’re always up with me ) Holler at me to get  the  heck to bed!!!!! Love you all!!!!

I feel like I haven’t written anything in so long. My earlier posts this week were such rants!

I can see these little changes happening and it’s so very exciting. I am getting all swept up in the momentum of the change and can’t wait to see what comes next. It’s such a nice place to be - very active in the change but not too focussed on exact outcomes. I do have one hope of dropping down some lbs by my High School Reunion, but other than that I just want to make my lifestyle fit me better. I really DO like to be active. I really DO like to eat smaller portions. I really do like to choose a carrot as a snack. I really do like to feel slim in the morning because I didn’t overeat the night before. I really do like going to the gym, to yoga, and to swim (this one I haven’t done lately). I really do like to repeat myself

It’s just so amazing to see that I now do my stretches for my back everyday - I never did anything everyday. I got so excited all day Wed because I knew I was going to the gym that night. I keep going to bed by 11 and not watching TV. These are all huge for me.

And, the big topper, was last night - there was this huge snow storm that hit here and we got at least a foot in a few hours. Well, my Phys Therpay was cancelled b/c of the snow and earlier in the week I didn’t get to go do my back exercises b/c of sick kid + no childcare. So that was all week with no strength training. I felt like I should really go, but the car was covered completely in snow, the road wasn’t plowed yet and I’m still jsut so new at this whole snow thing. (I grew up in Sav’h, GA and then lived in San Fran, CA for 15 years - so snow was only for skiing vacations). Anyway, my husband recommended I walk to the gym. It’s only about a 20 min walk usually, but I was kind of freaked by the snow. He told me how beautiful it would be and that I’d be safe, so I should do it. So, I went. It was gorgeous and quiet and lovely and a good workout - took me about 30 min to get there, did the strength training, then walked home with some groceries. If felt sooooo good to have gone - challenging both my fear and my muscles! And, I needed it after the dinner of Latkes (potato pancakes) I made!

Anyway, it’s pretty awesome. I’ve always loved the quote, “Be the change you hope to see in the world,” by Gandhi and I was never quite doing it. Always looking outside for change and now here it’s coming from inside. so nice. glad to be here.