i was drinking AND smoking this weekend!!!
Yep, it’s true - pregnant me was doing both. Luckily, it was just in a dream, but man, i must be stressed if i’m dreaming about drinking and smoking. I haven’t smoked in years!!! In the dream I knew I shouldn’t since I was pregnant but i decided it was okay for just a little bit -ugh! Woke up to that on Saturday morning but then had a lovely day UNTIL…
the stress, the mood, the grumpies all hit again - and with all that the out of control eating took center stage. I am just glad that my weigh in is on Saturday, so I have some time to make things right again in my body. Late night eating and tv, sneaking ice cream and choc cips. Yes, I am pregnant, but, no, i do not need to consume large quantities of CRAP when I am feeling mad, stressed, and scared which is what was going on. Then I just kind of gave up to the feelings.
I gave up for a day or two. I kept re-starting okay, but really was in an I don’t care mood. See, we STILL have no answers on our potential move yet and we’re in this waiting place on some job offers, so we have no control yet. We also have no decision yet and it is really taking it’s toll. I’m almost 5 mos preggers and we’d like to be settled soon but at this rate, who knows. The unsettled feelings are just getting to us at different points. There are moments away from that whicha re wonderful, but then there it is under everything - this giant sens of not knowing and not being where we are. As Zen as we try to be about living the life in teh moment and being here while we are here, it is getting increasingly difficult as we await some news that will allow us to decide and move forward. Either way, we will be moving as the place we’re in isn’t ideal and if we are staying here it’s time to get a better place…
So, I ate and then ate some more and then some more. The pregnancy offers an easy excuse - i can’t loose weight anyway - but that is a total cop out on healthy eating, controlled eating, and eating that just feels good. Sleeping was off as well all weekend. So here I am.
I am certain to keep going. I am certain I will not give up. But, I am bummed by some decisions I made this weekend and I’m not quite feeling ready for the good choices yet. I have a feeling the next few days will be an eating and self care struggle. I will keep doing the best I can. I will not get discouraged. I will keep attempting to choose well!
Please everyone keep trying and do not give up on yourselves - it is in the giving up that we really lose ourselves completely and become who we do not want to be…
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Thats a horrible dream Debbie!!! Uuuggghhh…I was a smoker once too. Arn’t you so happy to be smoke free.
Its ok that you have these “Munchie attacks” You can’t really help it, its the baby
My daughter is 4 months pregnant, and she has the same trouble.
I know you will work hard on healthy choices, life has handed you alot right now Debbie. I’m sure too God has a plan for the right job and the right move. Somedays its so hard to understand, but I have faith…and I have so much faith in you my most special friend. Big Big hugs for you today
Are you eating unhealthy, so-called diet food filled with chemicals that can potentially harm your baby?…Are you sitting around doing nothing? Are you sitting around feeling sorry for yourself? NO, YOU ARE NOT! You are taking car of you and that little one-to-be. And, that is your first priority. Believe me, you have to handle the pregnancy, and your little one. Let go of all the other worries. Your husband can handle them for another 4 months. I’m only telling you this, because I too, think I can take on everything at once, and eventually it takes its toll. Let loose a little Deb, and make you and the baby, top priority. Your husband can take up the slack for a little while. All my best to you and yours… flo
DANG IT DEBBIE, YOU SCARED ME WITH THAT TILE!! lol
Glad it was a dream only. Everyone has those days … you know… the I don’t care days…
But living in the regrets will only keep you down and not help you move forward. So here’s my Rx for you…
Go to local produce/nursery. Have your son pick out some pretty flowers in a pot. Take to local hospital. Go to local hospital and let your son deliver the flowers to someone in the hospital that doesn’t have flowers already in their room. You can ask a nurse at the nurse’s station to help you pick out someone. Or you can both take them to the local nursing home and give them away. Or you can take them to the local cancer treatment center and give them away. This will help your son learn about giving… it will also take your mind OFF yourself and your troubles, and I’m betting you will go home with a lighter heart and more pep in your step.
Mucho HUGGGGGGGGGGGS sweetie. This fog will clear. My promise to you.
Shan
Oh Debbie! What an awful dream!! I agree with Shan, I like the idea of the flowers. And also I agree for you to remember all the good things you are doing for yourself. This rough patch will pass and you will come on top, I know it. Hugs to you!
Well, we crave definite answers and directions because we then can execute plans and feel in control… Hanging in limbo is the worst!
Take care Debbie… there is always a yoga class with that so much needed balance and the sun, and the park, and the walk, and the here and now.
I am sure its like you said…the dream was caused by all the stress you are under BUT I believe the dream served its purpose to show you DEB things could be THAT bad! I understand being upset with feeling out of control. Its never fun or easy. I think God sometimes throws us curve balls to see how we handle things. You are doing a great job woman! Between stress and being pregnant, you have alot on your plate. I think you are allowed to step back from things for a bit and refocus but only when you are ready. You are gonna be fine. I have faith in ya
I pray God will give you peace and you will rest in Him today. Go easy on yourself…you are harmonal right now…so don’t panic.
It will be ok!
Blessings!
As usual, I am late with my comments so just read over everybody elses once again and each time you finish one think to yourself “Anj agrees with this person too!”
Debs…I know you can do it. Love ya…
Hang in there. Everything does seem out of control for you. I hope things settle soon and you know where you are going and what you need to do. Stay stronge and you will get through this.
Seriously I have given up as well it seems, but I know this is not the answer. I MUST AVOID THE SUGAR AS IT IS MAKING ME NUTS !
Hope you find a good answer for yourself as I am without wisdom *sigh*. Take care and find some cool ways to de-stress. I know you are Ms Cool. *hugs*